Fascinating Recovery

When I woke up from surgery I was fascinated by what was going on around me.  The first things I did was check the clock and check to see if I lost a tooth.  But then I found everything going on around me to be really interesting.  The girl to my right had a double mastectomy and had another wound, she was going home that day. Though interestingly she didn't have anyone there waiting for her, she had some friends meeting her later on - WOW!

A little while later a new patient came in to my left and she had also had a mastectomy.  Wow, apparently I need to get on top of my breast self checks!

When I woke up I asked for my parents, I knew that since I was staying overnight they would allow them in for a visit, unlike last time when I had to pull myself together.  The nurse said I had to wait until I left recovery, but I told her I was staying overnight and she said I could see them soon.  It did take a while to see them though since they had to change my IV first.  When my parents had left they told them it would be about an hour until I got my room, it ended up taking closer to 2 hours between getting some drugs (I wasn't in pain so I didn't take medication until after my parents left,) and getting all of my paperwork together.

There was a nurse who had been working recovery for about 3 months and she was my nurse.  But after 3 months she was having issues with managing 2 patients.  I heard a fair amount of conversation about her and the nurse mentoring her kept having to remind her to do things and keep on top of things and stuff.  I'm afraid poor old Sally doesn't have a career in recovery.  I hope I don't get to find out from experience though.  But who knows the nurse mentoring lives in my town so I could run into her somewhere.

I can't take the drama in my head

Years ago I took the Landmark Forum, part of Landmark Education. The short story is that it's a life improvement class, though that makes it sound really cheesy, it is much more then that. One of the lessons in it is about how your brain and mind are always thinking and talking to you. Too bad they don't tell you how to shut it up. They just tell you that it's stuff your mind makes up.

Well my mind wont stop talking and creating all this drama. I mentioned in my last post that I am considering staying at my parents house right after my surgery, and I'm 99% sure I'll do that, I just don't think I'll be able to handle icing my face that first day. I'm thinking this might end up being a good opportunity to listen to podcasts and cheesy movies I know every line to (but I wont mention any names). Today my Dad mentioned me staying for a couple days, WHAT, put the breaks on, who said a couple days? I was hoping to get out within 24 hours!

I'll have to admit that I personally don't enjoy spending large amounts of time with my parents simply because when they are together they fight non-stop. I can't deal with it... But also there is the whole, I'm sick I want my bed, and my couch and my stuff... I've been completely out of my house for 2 and a half years (mostly out for another 3 years before that.) It's my childhood home, but not my home. I love my little apartment, it's warm and fuzzy and has my stuff in it. That's where I want to be when I'm sick, even when I'm moaning I want my Mommy.

In the end I know I'll figure it out as I go and at some point I'll simply demand to go home, my Dad will comply and my Mom will probably yell at me. But in the meantime why can't I stop the fight in my head about how long I have to stay?